Slavery and despair

My next book that I am very slowly making my way through is Jesus + Nothing=Everything. Unfortunately I have not made enough time for reading lately and have been progressing too slowly through this book; it is something I want to make more time for. This morning while I was getting my hair done, it was a great time to sit without distractions nor interruptions and I was able to read over a chapter of this book. After some time away from reading, it was a balm to my soul and has renewed my desire and determination to make the most of my time so that I can be more faithful in reading.

This paragraph jumped out at me today...
"A third calamity from legalism is the way it traps us in slavery and despair. To define ourselves by what we must do, what we must accomplish, and who we must become-that's the epitome of slavery. When we believe, deep down, that God's blessing depends on how well we're behaving, we wither and groan under the heavy burden of self-reliance...to have everything riding on ourselves leads to despair, not deliverance."

I don't know about you but lately I've been withering and groaning under the heavy burden of self-reliance. Self-righteousness is so easy to fall into. Thinking that I am doing pretty good in my little acts of obedience and that I can actually please God with those acts. And then the inevitable failure in my own self righteousness that leads to the despair of self loathing, which happens when I feel like I've failed God and feel so guilty and burdened by that feeling. Today, more than ever, I am so thankful for the Cross, which completely obliterates both sides of the scale of self-reliance and self-loathing. I've been guilty of both sides of this horrible pendulum and it is such a needed reminder that my approval and blessing from God do not depend upon my sinful self. But on the Cross and only on the Cross!

Gus recently put this post on my Facebook wall:
"The cross guarantees that even in your darkest moment, God will never turn in disgust and walk away."
Paul Trip